Me, The Wretched Son Of Perdition

Besides John, is there anyone that knew Christ Jesus as well as the apostle Paul? While John was the loved disciple and shared an intimate older brother-younger brother relationship with Jesus, Paul shared a truly amazing spiritual relationship with Him that started on the road to Damascus. 

When I read Paul I see someone who has a lot of sin in his past, in 1 Tim. 1:15 he called himself the chief of sinners and in Ephesians 3:8 he called himself "less than the least of all saints". He persecuted and murdered his fellow Jew for the crime of following Jesus, he was there when Steven was stoned to death for the crime of spreading the good news of the risen Messiah. Was he there when Christ Himself was crucified? I'll wager that he was, and I'm also betting that he was there for Christ's trial, and torture, then after He died I'll bet Paul went off to his Passover celebration proud of a job well done. 

Then Jesus forgave him.

Paul knows sin, and Paul knows sinners. So when this scriptural genius (and he was, he was the smartest man in the New Testament) talks about sinners, he knows what he's talking about: 

10 as it is written,
  “There is none righteous, not even one; (Psalms 14:1-3)
11 There is none who understands,
   There is none who seeks for God; (Psalms 14:1-3)
12 All have turned aside, together they have become useless;
   There is none who does good,
   There is not even one.” (Psalms 14:1-3)
13 “Their throat is an open grave,
    With their tongues they keep deceiving,” (Psalms 5:9)
   “The poison of asps is under their lips”; (Psalms 140:3)
14 “Whose mouth is full of cursing and bitterness”; (Psalms 10:7)
15 “Their feet are swift to shed blood, (Isaiah 59:7)
16 Destruction and misery are in their paths, (Isaiah 59:7)
17 And the path of peace they have not known.” (Isaiah 59:7)
18 “There is no fear of God before their eyes.” (Psalms 36:1)

(Romans 3:10-18)

I know in my heart that Paul is talking about me. I've broken every single commandment, every law, every  desire that God had for me, and in the end I must stand before God and give accounting for what I did with the life He gave me. If it wasn't for Christ Jesus' saving grace I am not worthy to stand in God's presence for his judgement and sentencing to eternal damnation that I so deserve. I can do nothing good, nothing worthy, nothing at all that would permit me a moment of God's divine attention other than to accept his wrath that I have earned. 

I am wicked and sinful and foul and unfit to stand in His holy presence. Yet somehow in His divine grace He  took pity on me, me the son of perdition. In He sanctified me, instead of crushing me as I so deserve He instead paid my debt to Him by sending His son, Jesus, to be punished because of what I did. Whipped, tortured, humiliated, then cruelly murdered Jesus suffered all the horrors of what my sins earned for me. 

Then He turned around and forgave me.

Me, the wretched son of perdition.